I feel very hypocritical right now.

We all know that I don't believe in letting the number on the scale rule my life--that's the only way I've been able to successfully lose weight without going right back up like I have in the past. Still, I weigh myself every so often cause I like to keep myself in check. Also, I'm a very curious person.

Last time I weighed myself was about a month ago, and I was at 154 for a total loss of 66 pounds. I was perfectly content with this.

Yesterday I ran 10 miles and felt very kickass and awesome. Today I woke up and thought to myself that perhaps a moment with the scale wouldn't be too bad.

I weighed 154.

I'm not going to lie, this totally bummed me out. I have spent the past month eating well, exercising regularly--being healthy in general. And the freaking scale couldn't give me even one pound?!?! I wish that it didn't bother me. Logically, I know that it could be because of water weight, an increase in muscle, that evil thing called my uterus, etc, etc. But it doesn't mean that it wasn't kind of a downer.

The difference between the present and the past is that I'm not going to stop doing what I'm doing, cause obviously it got me somewhere. So perhaps I'll let another month go by and see if it gives me a couple pounds. Or maybe I won't. Really if this is where my body decides to stop losing weight and start maintaining, I think I will be fine with that. I like the size I am now. I feel healthy and strong and more confident, which is exactly what I have been trying to achieve.

So I just have to keep telling myself the number doesn't matter, the number doesn't matter.... I really hate that scale and its evil whorish ways. Maybe I should just throw the damn thing away.